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December 05, 2007

Balancing desire

For as long as we have existed, sex has been an integral part of being human. For many people sex is their most motivating force. Others can live very happily without it. If neither you, nor your partner want to have sex it is perfectly OK to abstain. But as long as one or both of you have sexual desires it is most important to have a healthy sex life.

You should only have one sexual partner with whom you are physically, emotionally and spiritually involved, and sex should meet both partners needs. If one partner has a higher sex drive then the other it is can cause tension, resentment and frustration in all areas of the relationship. There are many reasons for imbalance of desire. For now, it is important to understand that the reason for desire is that men are solar and women are lunar, but sexual organs are reversed.

Many couples will try and excite their less interested partner with oral sex. Oral sex is so exciting because sun and sun or moon and moon combine and become more extreme. This will often increase existing imbalances, the one who desires will desire more and the one who has no desire will have even less.

Instead try lying together every day, you can do this fully clothed if you prefer so that it is less threatening to the partner who doesn't want to have sex, and less stimulating for the partner who does, but it doesn't really matter. What is important is that the aspects are correctly aligned, heads touching, feet touching, genitals touching. The sun and moon will interact to balance one another, calming or stimulating as needed.

You can have penetrating sex without movement once both partners consent and build from there. Once healthy and natural desire has returned it is important to begin regular sex again, to ensure the energy does not become blocked.

Whatever you do don't stress out. Sex should be fun and playful, but imbalanced desire is more common than people like admit.

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