I've decided to tell a few more people. At first we only told our immediate families and three of my closest girl friends. Not telling has been on the hardest things and as my symptoms get worse it's not as easy to hide anymore.
I've been looking pretty green at work and getting a few questions so I decided to come clean. I'm lucky to work in a very supportive workplace in a team of all women so they are all thrilled and full of tips for coping with the sickness. Of course at 8 weeks the pregnancy still isn't that well established, but they all understand the risks.
Before I was pregnant I believed I wouldn't tell anyone until 12 weeks, but now I'm here it's a lot more complicated than I expected.
It feels so oppressive to suffer in silence, why should all these women deal with the first trimester alone, without the support of their workplace, friends, family, other mums. Sheila Kitzinger reckons that often the first trimester is the hardest, and I think we should be able to share the good times and the bad. Whilst the risk of misscarriage doesn't decline for another 4 weeks, I'd like their support if we did lose this tiny child. I'd rather not keep my grief a secret. This is real life, shit happens and I'd like to be able to talk about it.
And they are all so excited, why wouldn't I want to incude them on this wonderful journey!
I'm not ready to completely go public just yet. Whilst I told my team I'm not telling the remaining 140 people at my workplace. I'm not posting these just yet, and it's certainly not going on face book!